Roses can say so many things. A single or double as a gesture, can mean a million words and emotions.



As I had a few hours to catch breath, regroup, repack and adjust my compass, I found myself walking past a very special location. A place that has many echoes of history, of creativity, of life changing events not only for myself but many, many others. A place that’s been closed and seeming nearly forgotten already due to the “change and progress” of Harlem. As I travel the world: from Russia to Rockford, IL, I come to even more conclusions that things and people change. If you want something to have longevity and mastery of time, one must evolve, make oneself open and vulnerable and become enforced with an inner strength that’s unmeasured. I find, that if some type of formula or focus is not achieved, the changes of longevity and mastery of time and change, are nearly too low to measure at all. Looking up at the now cryptic letters and windows blocked out with impenetrable paper. I remember and try to blink back the tears. Recalling the once vibrant and unique lounge in Harlem, my heart aches still. She reminds me of reality, of new and old love. And how cultivation, respecting and knowing what love is, compassion, and evolution of Self can live and die, just as it can live on forever.  

Nutcracker season! 

Greetings all!! It’s been quite awhile since I’ve written!! Life has been interesting, as usual. As a ballerina, this time of year can either be down time: rest and recovery or High energy, mental and physically demanding: nutcracker season!!! For me, it’s Open Season!!! Lots of Travel, pointe shoes and tutus to barefoot, grounded and exploration of all emotions!! So please, be on the look out for more writings! For now, I’ll share a few pictures from rehearsals, recently. Body and mind holding up nicely. Take care everyone!!  


Swan sighting…

A little over a week ago, a had the opportunity to perform in a first annual recital in BK. I was asked by a friend of mine to come and represent ballet/ballerinas that reflect cultural aspects of which, majority of the students reside. They are a small number in addition to the many in various locations, in need of exposure to artists that can not only teach, but show them that it is possible. And that they too can achieve whatever their goals may be! No matter what you look like, what you’ve been through or where you come from. Here’s a video from that blessing of an evening performance.  The rawness of the quality and commentary: matter of fact, golden and priceless. 

God said, it was time.

greetings all. I couldn’t sleep so, I’m writing a letter to a friend, who has recently transitioned. 

 My Dearest Jeremiah,

First off, I’d like to say that, as you know God works and moves in the most amazing ways. Speaking with you last night was an absolute pleasure, as usual! Life picks up and takes us up in a wirl and we are off!! To do this and that!! To continue moving and changing people’s lives with ease.  But, within those times, we’ve always found each other on minds and hearts!! Always looking forward to the next time we speak, to the next time we engage in a simple conversation and even possibly, the honor of sweating and creating with each other. Remembering the last time we danced together and brought the house down!! Remembering when I saw your arms stretched out wide, smiling widely, waiting for me to run into them and exhale with a calmness and security that is unmeasurable, Remembering the last time we laughed until there were tears and silent convulsions of hilarious bliss. No matter where I’d end up, the moment we met when we were younger and the recent moments of standing side by side, face to face in a much needed embrace, stay with us, always. 

There was no way possible, that I’d know, when I felt to reach out to you and check in, would be the final time I got to speak with you and share our thoughts, experiences and everlasting love and support for each other. For this, I know even more that God moves in amazing ways. That I had the privlage to tell you how much I missed  you. I’m proud of you and that I love you. And that I’d be privileged enough, to hear you say the exact same thing to me. For these simple ways of life, was your way of life! 

I’m honored to have been apart of your amazing life tapestry! The amount of inspiration, hope, joy, everlasting love, zest for life, focus and determination is unmeasured!! Not even to mention your ability to enjoy making and being apart of the endless smiles and gut busting laughter. Like a conductor of an elite orchestra!! Amazing and so beautiful you are!! 

Now, you are done here on this Earth yet, live on within all whom you’ve touched and everything you’ve accomplished. I thank you for all of your: EVERYTHING!! Loving you forever! And dance on and hit that leg up on the 1!!! I hear your Custom made songs in my head, I see and feel your movement. And passion all around us!! As usual! Here’s to you and all of your awesomeness!!  You are along with a few others I’ve had the honor of knowing, the epitome of living life to the fullest (full out, as we Artists/Dancers say) joining in an amazing  display and arrangement of creativity, with those whom have transitioned. We are in no way, ready or worthy to see and experience such a thing, just yet!  Love always and simply, Paunika

Bound, restriction, will, freedom.

This photo says so much! It came along at the most fitting time. The struggle, the will to continue! The obstacles seem to keep multiplying yet I keep on going, who informed you that you couldn’t do it?Who confirmed that you could? I may be riddled with scratches and bruises but I keep on my toes, my eyes open and keep breathing and moving onward!! I could not do anything that I do without God, you lovely friends and family and sheer faith/will!